The suit was on my mind the whole weekend. We all know how crazy a lady’s mind can get especially when the curiosity button is activated. I didn’t want to think the worst but I had no idea why a suit would boggle my mind that much. Maybe this was my sixth sense telling me that something fishy was going on but I kept brushing it aside and gave all the reasonable excuses as to why he would travel for a weekend getaway with a suit. “Maybe they had a boy’s dinner? Or he was having a business meeting while on the getaway? or maybe they were meeting someone prominent during the trip and they had to have some decorum! I couldn’t make up mind which one of this made sense but I held on to them anyway and waited for the confirmation when Mr. comes back.
David came back Sunday evening, I had missed him but I was more curious about the suit than anything else and I didn’t know how to bring it up without sounding like an insecure lass. So I beat around the bush with other stories until I finally brought it up and asked why he went to Kisii with a suit. He casually answered that that was not his suit, it was Mwangi’s. He put it in his car and forgot to go with it after they met on Thursday so we dropped it on our way out of Nairobi. That made sense, and I silently hated myself for thinking too hard about a suit and gave a smile and moved on with life.
Everything went back to normal at least on my end until one time over dinner we had an unexpected fight. We fought about food and he was more annoyed at the idea of me making junk food for dinner than anything else. “How can you make bhajia and fried chicken for dinner?” He ranted. “Are you trying to kill me with cholesterol?” He continued. I was perplexed I did not whether to laugh or cry. This was very confusing knowing that he always loved my bhajias or was he faking that whole time? Or did someone exchange my boyfriend with a clone? As I collected my scattered thoughts and tried to remain calm, David stood up and left the house. Everything was happening so fast and I didn’t know what to do anymore, so I just sat and stared at the door.
Days passed as I tried to figure out what that fight was all about. For the next two days he neither drank or ate anything in that house. I was worried stiff. I experienced sleepiness nights trying to understand what David was so mad about.
His attitude began to change. He started eating healthy food and was very focused about maintaining a healthy diet. He even started exercising to loose weight and keep fit. This was all new to me. I didn’t know how to deal with it but I was curious about what suddenly triggered his change in his lifestyle. The menu at home changed hence I could no longer make the bhajias, pizzas and fried foods anymore. It became a taboo to even mention them.
My curiosity did not die down so easily. I was happy he made the decision to live a healthy life but where did this idea come from and who triggered it for it to have become part and parcel of his life. Whenever I asked him, he mentioned that one of his friends was taken to hospital because of a lifestyle disease and he didn’t want it to catch up with him.
As we moved on with our lives, I found myself also been dragged to this healthy living until one time I started craving chicken wings and a burger almost everyday. I quickly pegged it on the sudden change in my diet since at this point we were becoming vegetarians, with all the salads and smoothies we were taking on a daily. The cravings came in with other lifestyle changes like exhaustion, nausea and sleeping sickness. I could now afford to sleep anywhere, even at the busstop while standing. Without torturing myself any further I opted to visit a doctor to confirm that being partly vegetarian hadn’t made me sick. However, I got far more surprisingly happy news, ‘we were going to be new parents’. That was my cue to drop the vegetarian phase and quickly hop on to the chicken wings wagon and enjoy a burger at least every chance I got.
We stopped having meals together. He mentioned that my way of eating is harmful to my body as well as the baby hence he will not be part of it. I couldn’t help myself. I just wanted to keep eating and eating more chicken wings and more burgers.
Days turned into months. We became strangers all in the name of healthy living. I didn’t understand why he was so religious and judgy about everything. He should understand that this was not me acting out but I was actually having a baby inside of me that was now in control of my body.
We lived like strangers with the normal hellos and goodbyes being exchanged every once in a while. I was still very hopeful, I knew once I give birth, we would go back to normal because I will have leased back my body. However,I kept feeling that this was unfair.
One Saturday, when I was almost 40 weeks pregnant, I woke up with the amazing realisation that I was going to be home alone.I had waited for this weekend for a longtime. It was one of those weekend, I would have the entire house to myself. No judgy partners to give me obnoxious irritating sideeyes while I enjoy my chicken wings with fries and salsa. No one to fight with about what to watch on TV. Noone to give me sneers from here to Timbuktu because I was to watch my everyday favorite, ‘if loving you is wrong.’ I was going to be a happy girl for a whole entire weekend just by myself. As soon as I sat down to have my morning chocolate cup at about 7.30am, I heard a knock on the door. It was Sharon, Mwangi’s sister. She stood there timidly as if she wasn’t sure whether she should come in or not. I smiled warmly and welcomed her in with my bulging stomach almost hugging her from the door. I felt like an elephant at 40 weeks. I could no longer fit in some spaces anymore. Maybe that intimated her because even after asking her to come in she still stood looking very sorry and worried about me for whatever reason. “I am not sick Sharon, I am pregnant, come on in!”
She walked in and quickly explained her reason for popping by that early in the morning.”Mwangi has asked me to come and get a pair of David’s black shoes, he would like to wear them to a wedding.” I smiled and told her not to worry I will get them for her as I call David to confirm.
I tried more than five times to reach David’s phone but he didn’t pick up. I was used to the cat and mouse game by now, whereby he never picks up my call and calls 5hours later when I am probably away from the phone. I wasn’t worried it had become the norm. I handed the shoes to Sharon and told her to just make sure she returns in good condition.
As Sharon was walking out of the house, she got tripped by the doormat and her clutch went sprawling to the floor. A beautiful wedding card slipped out of her clutch and fell right at my feet.
David Musembi Kasee
Georgina Moraa Onsinyo
Coordially invite you to our wedding …
And that’s all I could manage to read before I lost my breath and immediately felt pain in my lower abdomen and before I knew it, I was going into labor. Everything was happening so fast. I eventually lost all my strength and fell to the floor unconscious.
Sharon immediately realized that the secret was finally out and she didn’t have time to get away with it, instead she had to rush me to hospital and get me immediate help.
Twelve hours later, I lay in my bed looking at the white hospital ceiling starting to regain my consciousness and my location bearing. No one was at my bedside at that moment except the computerized beeping of the hospital machine. I touched my stomach and there was excrutiating pain coming from my lower abdomen. I didn’t have a baby inside of me, I could tell but I felt as if my body was still in shock from what had happened to it. I pressed the button to alert the nurses I was awake. A young, tall, slender lady with a warm smile and a gap between her teeth walked in and tendered to me. Sooner or later, I saw my mum walk in then later my sister and my younger brother. They all looked solemn and I could tell something was not right.
“Where’s my baby?” I asked the nurse. She quickly told me to rest and she will be back soon to help with me with my wound. Nobody spoke, they all just hugged me and looked at me with some sort of pity then began walking out and I was left with my mum. She told me, I needed to rest , we will deal with my baby later when I have regained my strength. I couldn’t fight them, I was too weak to fight.
Twenty four hours later, I found out my baby died while the doctor performed the ceacerian section and they couldn’t do anything to save him. It was a ‘Him’. I was going to have a ‘son’. I broke down into tears and wept continuously for the next coming days.
As I lie in hospital, I had lost my baby and the father of the baby was half way across the world on his way to his honeymoon with his new wife. I was tired, I wanted to give up on life. As the hours passed, I just slept there helpless and forlon as I tried to pick up the strength to bury my dead child.
Now the suit made sense. It was my first warning that he had gone to get himself a wife on that weekend. But how would I have known?